TORI!!!!!!

Last Sunday, December 16, 2007 was a day I had been anticipating for months... the final concert of Tori Amos's worldwide tour was right here in Los Angeles, and Denise, Phil, and I had tickets! When Tori's latest album, "American Doll Posse," was released, Denise ordered it for me through itunes, paying a bit extra for the pre-sale ticket option. So, when the tickets were finally announced, we had a pre-sale code to get tickets early, which we also provided to Phil so he could get early tickets as well. The irony is that despite the fact that we gave Phil the code and ordered our tickets before Phil, he got better seats than us! I'm assuming this is because he ordered just one ticket for himself, therefore he could be squeezed closer to the front in between multiple parties, but I was still slightly jealous and considered taking him out. ;)

The concert was at the Nokia Center (yes, the phone company, an unfortunate trend of arenas these days), a new venue downtown next to the Staples Center (yes, the office supply company, don't ask me). It is a very nice theater, the lobby is fully equipped with bathrooms, several bars, and of course, display cases full of Nokia phones (gag). Upon our entrance, I went straight to the memorabilia stand. I was on a mission to finally purchase a Tori Amos t-shirt. This was my third Tori concert, but the prior two occurred at times in my life when I was flat broke.... college. I'm finally at a point in my life where I can afford a concert tee! Sad, but true. However, mission accomplished! I have one and I love it.

After my success we headed for the bar line to get a beer for Denise and some wine for myself. We said our goodbyes to Phil and headed to our seats. Even though we did not have the fantastic view Phil did (he said she was pretty much right in front of him), we still had excellent seats. This was by FAR the closest I had ever been to Tori (remember Kate when we were like in the last seat in the last row? haha!). We were seated next to some lovely, but chatty, gay boys who just wanted Tori to sing "Cruel," and she did.

I will not go into every detail of the performance because honestly that would be boring AND it is really sort of a blur. She was two of her characters that night, as well as herself at the end. In case any of you are wondering if Tori has multiple personality disorder, I will say maybe. Haha! Seriously though, she is an ARTIST and we cannot question her artistic decision to perform on this album as 4 other characters at times and at others as Tori! Artists just think differently than we do and we are not meant to understand! :) In all honesty, I love that she did that, it makes her album more poignant and it allows her to explore aspects of her personality, and the collective consciousness, that she might not be able to tap into otherwise just as herself. Maybe I do understand..... but I digress. Back to the task at hand.

She first appeared as Isabel (which meant a blond wig). I remember she sang "Yo George," and "Waitress." I can't recap song for song, but I can say that throughout the whole concert there was a lot of stuff from "Under the Pink," which was a nice surprise. Second, she came out as Pip (which meant a black wig), one of the angriest characters on the album. This performance was pretty powerful. She did "Fat Slut," and and AMAZING rendition of "Cruel," as well as other high-energy songs that I can't quite think of. Finally, she was good ol Tori again. Other songs that come to mind are "Amber Waves," "Bouncing Off Clouds," "Crucify," "Talula," and on, and on, and on. The lighting was fantastic, her costumes were eclectic, and the audience went ballistic. :) After hours of performing, two encores, and a bow, the night was over. I L.O.V.E.D. IT! Someone told me of a rumor that this might be her last big world tour, if this is true, color me depressed right now. :(

One final story... after the concert, I had to pee. We went around back to the parking garage where some bathrooms were still open. After I came out I was talking to Denise and laughing much too loud as always. This night however, my loudness was to my advantage because I caught the ear of a man walking by that worked on the tour. He said, "Hey! Are you a die hard fan?" I hesitantly said yes, wondering what he was going to try to sell me. He replied, "Here you go. It's not signed, but it was used in the show." He flicked something at me, and it landed on the ground in glorious "clink." It was a guitar pick used in the show!! I will not go into all the random events that fell into place to get me that pick, but it was destiny. :)

After my brush with destiny, we waited around out back with a few other fans who had heard whispers that Tori might be exiting out the back door. After an hour had passed and still no Tori, we decided to leave because it was freezing and I could stand the pain no longer.

Another night with Tori was over, but I went to sleep that night smiling, holding the pick in my hand, dreaming of rainbows and kitty paws. (Not really, but what a great ending to the story huh?)

I will survive

My fan club

I don't need no damn rope

At the TOP!
This last weekend Denise and I went to REI to browse and see just what Denise could buy with the gift cards she received for her Birthday. I think all in all, it totaled about $350.00, which can go very quickly at that store. At the store they have a climbing wall in the corner. I am curious about rock climbing, and a part of me thinks I would really love it, but another part is scared of plummeting off a cliff. Anyway, I was sort of meandering around the wall and checking it out, when a salesperson asked me if I wanted to climb. I was a bit nervous (and also thought I had to pay), so I said "No, that's alright." Denise said, "Yes, she does." Then I said, "No, that's ok." Then she said, "Come on, you know you want to." Then I said, "Ummm...let's do it!" I put on the harness, some official climbing shoes, and stepped onto the wall. The moment I grabbed onto the pegs, I realized that this was going to be much harder than it seemed.

As I have heard in the past, rock climbing is much more about your legs than arms. Your legs are what propel you up, while your arms are more for balance and grip. I made it so far up the wall, but due to my short stature and tight denim jeans, I could not get my left leg up high enough to boost myself up to the next level. I tried and tried to no avail, and my arms were shaking so bad that I was about to let go and find a cute jacket instead. However, I looked down to see that I had amassed a little fan club (the pics above are ones Denise took with my cell phone) that had surrounded Denise. One kid yelled out, "You can do it!" How could I stop after that? I could not be the one to show small impressionable children that when life gets tough, you give up.

Finally, my arms just gave out, and I swung a bit around to the side of the wall. I latched on to another peg, and notice that this portion had steps much more my size. I was determined to make it up. I let my arms rest for a minute, and then I started my ascent. I pushed myself up with each crevice until I reached the top. I rang the bell triumphantly and the children cheered. I felt like I had been the protagonist in a children's story about never giving up and the power of perseverance. I felt accomplished. :)

When I got off that rock, I could tell immediately that my arms were not once what they used to be. I could barely unbuckle the clasp that kept my harness on. Lifting my arms above my waste was an effort. The next few days were pretty painful, and all from a 10 minute climb to the stop of this wall. I can't imagine how much climbing an actual rock face would kick my ass, but a part of me wants to find out.

That night we went to Cathleen and Rhonda's cheap wine tasting party. The rule was that you had to bring a bottle of wine that you paid $8.00 or less for (so on sale items counted). It was placed in a paper bag, lettered, and sorted into one of three categories: light, medium, or bold. Each person was then given a lettered score sheet, and you went to each table tasting the various anonymous wines. In the end, I think there were about 30 bottles to taste. It was SO much fun as always. As has been discussed several times by our group of friends, this party is so great because everyone is drinking the same amount of alcohol as everyone else, so you all get tipsy right around the same time. After the wine tasting is done, the votes are tallied, and the top three wines are revealed. Denise was determined to win this year, but alas, it did not happen. Maybe next year my love.

After the ceremonies, two lovely ladies did fire dancing in the back alley which was amazing. I did find myself wondering though what the neighbors were thinking, and what I would do if I looked out the window to see fire flying around behind my house. Then I realized we were in Venice, and I'm sure they have seen many strange things going on behind their houses, so fire dancing is just another occurrence to add to their list.

After the party we met up with a friend at a local bar, lets just say more drunken debauchery, Denise peeing in a doorway, and off key singing all the way home ended the evening.

The next day was TORI AMOS, but I think that definitely warrents its' own post.

One final note, the finale of Tila Tequilla was last night, and surprise, surprise, she picked Bobby instead of Dani. Denise and I predicted this almost from the beginning of the episode based on body language and the affection she showed Bobby, but it was still disappointing none the less. On the one hand, I realize that it was just a dumb realiy show, and did break some barriers since the final girl was a type of lesbian that is not represented on mainstream television that often (and a type Tila herself didn't even know she could care for), but it was still the same ol disappointment of the lesbian never winning. I can't help but think that despite the few strides this show made for the lesbians, the final message was still the sterotypical idea that when bisexual women are faced with the choice of a man and a woman, the man will win because she truly wants "the penis." Ugh... I'm sick of that. Again, I'm not by any means saying this is true and I know many bisexual woman end up with women, but the mainstream media does not represent those women, and this reality show could have been a way to prove that a woman can capture another woman's heart just as well as a man can. But alas, twas not to be. Maybe the next show will redeem us because, that's right folks, "A shot at love 2" is in the works. It will not be with Tila, but with some other fiesty bi-sexual model. Still, I really think that lesbians can't look to television to validate our relationships, we just have to continue to do it the way we always have, by just living our life in open, loving relationships. Carry on my people. :)

I will never take my mouth for granted again...

I'm back, and feeling SO much better than I did about this time a week ago. As you can see above, I swelled up and resembled a chipmunk which Denise helped me to document with this lovely juxtaposition of myself and an actual chubby cheeked chipmunk.

Not only did my wisdom teeth need to come out, but they were impacted under my gums, which in dental terms is an extraction. This translates into them slicing my gums and cutting at my wisdom teeth until they could get them all out. All four...ugh. Anyway, I was given what is known as "twilight sleep," which means that I can still breath on my own, but I'm basically unaware of the disgusting process that is happening in my mouth. I have slight impressions of talking around me and my mouth moving, but no memory of what really happened.

After the surgery, and a stop at Target, I stumbled home onto the couch with wads of bloody gauze (I feel you all can handle the uncensored version :) in my mouth, that needed to be changed every half hour or so. Vince stopped by to pick up some stuff, and he accurately said they looked like "alien pod babies." I stayed doped up on Ibuprofen, Tylenol/codeine, with a hint of antibiotics for about a week. I'm still a bit sore, and have to take some pain relievers every once in awhile, but all in all I'm doing much better.

After a week, I had a check up with the oral surgeon, who gave me a water syringe to rinse out the nasty, rotting food that gets stuck in the sockets which remain. It is definitely gross, but also slightly fascinating, and a relief for my sensitive gums.

I think after this, it will be smooth sailing, but I have much more appreciation of the pain that can be associated with oral procedures (don't be dirty;).

Wisdom Teeth

I had my wisdom teeth out Monday, I will return when the swelling goes down. :)

The Holidays and Stuff

Denise shows off her photoshop skills... she does Birthday cards as well. :)



Our album is due out in '08

The Thanksgiving Holiday gave us another opportunity to pack up the truck and make our way to Sacramento, CA. We always have a blast when we go up there, so Denise and I were very excited to get on the road. However, we had to make one little stop before we could hit the highway.....Baron's vet in Santa Monica.

For those non-LA peeps out there, it may appear on a map that Santa Monica is quite close to Hollywood, but if you know LA traffic, then you know that on a good day it will take you at LEAST a half hour to get over there. UGH! The day we had to go was Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving, at about 2:00 in the afternoon, just about the time when anyone who had not fled the city yet was trying to get out at that very moment.

A bit of back story, the reason we had to go to the vet was because a few weekends ago, Baron had suddenly become very sick. All the good stuff like puking, diarrhea, etc. We rushed him to the vet, and discovered that Denise had accidentally given him too much of his chemo meds. He was severely dehydrated, had to be put on an IV drip overnight. Denise was devastated and was being so hard on herself. I told her we all make mistakes and that at least we brought him in when we did. She was being down on herself to our friend Laura, and Laura told me if she said one more negative thing about herself I was to kick her in her shins.... I performed my duty when I had to. :) Anyway, the next day we picked him up and he was like a new dog. It's amazing what some fluids will do. The rest of the week and following weekend he was pretty lethargic, so the vet wanted to check him out one more time before we whisked him away to Sacramento, hence, the drive out there on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving.

After Barons check-up, antibiotics, and a cone for his head (he was obsessively licking) we headed for the I-5. The distance from the vet to the on ramp for the highway (I know, it's really a freeway, but I refuse to change.;) is about 1 mile. It took us ONE HOUR just to reach the on ramp!! Insanity! I could see the veins busting out of Denise's neck as she tried to negotiate the traffic. Once we were physically on the highway, it took us about 2 hours to get away from the city and all the traffic. Obviously we knew there would be traffic, but I believe you can never really prepare yourself for the madness of the Holidays.

The drive for the rest of the way was quite nice, and we reached Sacramento at about 1AM. After some hugs and hellos we all went to bed.

THANKSGIVING!! Yea, I love this Holiday I must say. Even though I don't eat turkey, I love the idea of getting together with friends and/or family, being thankful for what we have, and sharing all this wonderful food together that we spent the day preparing (well, I don't really prepare food, but I set the table! :). Despite the checkered historical past of this day, I like that it isn't necessarily tied to any Religion, and is just a day to be thankful, which I think most people can agree is a good thing. Ok, argument for my pro Thanksgiving feelings over, and on to the food!!

Denise and Becky spent pretty much the whole day cooking, and we ate around 6PM. Denise had bought me a tofurky feast consisting of a small tofurky, carrots and potatoes, dumplings, and veggie gravy. She also made me vegan mashed potatoes and a vegan pumpkin pie!! Best.Girlfriend.EVER!! I am so lucky. :) After all that slaving over an open flame, we devoured the food in about 10 minutes, and all sat back moaning in pain from our full bellies. Denise had to lay on her left side twice to promote digestion! haha! It was a great day with Katy and Becky just hanging out... just what we had envisioned Thanksgiving would be.

The rest of the trip was pretty chill. On Friday, Becky, Katy, and I all rode scooters, while Denise rode the motorcycle, to get coffees at Kim's coffee shop, Butch and Nellies (great name huh?). It was the first time I rode a scooter further than a block, so it was pretty exciting. I LOVED it! Later that night Denise and I met up with Kim, her girlfriend Christy, and our friend Tracy who was visiting from LA as well, at a little bar not far from their house. I learned how to play a couple of dice games at the bar, and attempted to keep a very drunk man off my girlfriend, failing miserably. She ended up taking care of it herself...damn, I have to get better at this Knight in shining armor stuff.

Saturday we went wine tasting, a tradition at this point for us ladies. We all got loaded as usual, and passed out when we got back to the house. Katy and Becky have a couple of friends that are moving to Washington State, so we all had to pep up and go out for their going away gathering. It was nice to see everyone, but after some conversation, food, and funny photos of Becky, it was time to go home.

Sunday was the day Denise and I were driving back, but first we drove to see the place where Katy and Becky are going to have their commitment ceremony. A few weeks ago, they officially became domestic partners, and this October they are going to have a ceremony with their family and friends. The place they have chosen is BEAUTIFUL! It is a gorgeous ranch out in the middle of rolling hills, trees, and a very eclectic garden which is cared for by a woman that manages the ranch. After the tour, we stopped by the local casino because we all have a gambling addiction that we can't quite kick. Ok, I'm trying to be funny, cause isn't gambling addiction hilarious, I mean....I'm retarded. hahaha! We REALLY stopped there because that is where people will stay who are attending the ceremony because it can accommodate everyone. See, less exciting isn't it.

On our way out of town we stopped by a local winery because Katy and Becky are considering using their wine for the ceremony after-party. ;) Above are a couple of pictures we took by the grapes. Someday we will make music to match all our "band" photos.

It was a wonderful Holiday, and we were sad to leave as usual. Who knows when we will head up again, but we always know it will be a great time! WE LOVE U SACRAMENTO LADIES! xo

Fairy Tales Do Come True...

This last weekend Denise and I went to Palm Springs to stay at a fancy resort known as the Viceroy. Awhile ago Denise won employee of the year at her work (yea!), and her prize was a day off and a 2-night stay at this resort. We drove up Friday night after work, comfortably dressed in sweats and tennis shoes, with my fan (I need it to sleep) in tow.

We pulled up to the hotel, and could tell from the valet awaiting us, that this was a pretty upscale place. We entered the lobby, which was almost completely white, to check in. Right next to the lobby is the bar/restaurant for the hotel, with all the Friday night scenesters dressed in their latest designer gear, sipping on their cocktails. It is through this group of people that we had to walk with our shabby cloths and my fan (although we did put it in a mesh bag:). It was pretty funny, and a tad embarrassing.

After we got into the room, we decided to stay in and just enjoy it. It came fully stocked and even included a glass filled, gas powered, fireplace. We both took showers, and got into the robes which were provided in the room. I must say, they were AMAZING. SO soft inside, yet smooth and cottony on the outside; warm, but not too heavy. I would have definitely taken one, if I had the $115.00 they were going to charge us. eeek! Above is a ridiculously dorky picture of myself on the best bed in the world, covered in some imported Italian bedding. It was lovely.

On Saturday we went to Tahquitz Canyon, which is an ancient Indian Canyon now fully equipped with a visitor's center and ranger led hikes if you wish. The hike leads back to a waterfall in the Canyon, which was pretty much a trickle right now since there really hasn't been any rain. Still, it was a very beautiful and interesting hike, totally worth the $12.50 admittance fee. Here is a link to Palm Springs Canyons http://www.palmsprings.com/points/canyon/ It has an interesting history, full of dirty hippies (I gest) trashing up the canyon, getting kicked out, community meetings, and the eventual restoration of the canyon.

Saturday night we went to dinner at a place called Big Wangs in the desert (which I thought was a completely comical name for a restaurant in Palm Springs, since there are gay man EVERYWHERE). We then retired for the evening, deciding to continue to take advantage of the hotel room, and stay in. After debating on just what to order from room service, we decided on fresh baked cookies, prepared in 15 minutes, at a bargain price of $9.00. I was SO excited. After about 30 minutes passed, Denise called them again, reminding them we had ordered cookies. The girl said she would check on it. Another 20 minutes passed, and someone called to tell us the cookies would be on their way. Soon there was a knock at our door, and the manager of restaurant personally brought us the cookies and apologized. He would not accept a tip and gave us the cookies for free!! The cookies were fresh, warm, and accompanied by a bowl of whipped creamy goodness for you to dip your cookie in if you wished. I wasn't very true to my non-dairy ways that evening, but I could not resist after the orgasmic look on Denise's face as she took the first bite.

Sunday we packed up and said good-bye to our get away. On our way out of Palm Springs we stopped by Joshua Tree. Joshua Tree is a National Park full of Mountains, which look more like piles of boulders, surrounded by.... well, Joshua Trees. It was so much fun climbing and hopping between the rocks making our way up to the top. We plan on going back again, perhaps to camp for a night or two depending on the weather. Here is a link with pictures http://www.desertusa.com/jtree/josh_month.html

Sunday night we pulled into the garage, and lugged all our stuff to the apartment for a quiet evening in. Well.... not quite. We had game night of course!! Vince, Justin, and Corey came over for game night. This time we played spades, and Denise drank every drop of wine in the house, including the port. hahaha! I have no idea what got into her, but the next morning she told me she thew up! I had no clue.... she definitely paid for it Monday morning. A perfect end to a lovely weekend.

One final thing! I forgot to say that once again, Denise and I (well, mostly me) were confronted with the realization that we might be staying in a haunted room! Here are the details: Friday night, we get to our room. Literally the moment the manager shuts the door to our room, the television turns on all by itself. Of course inside Denise and I are both freaking out, but because neither of us want to scare the other, we both try to ignore it.

Flash forward to Sunday morning. I'm slowly awakened by voices coming from the direction of the television. I slowly open my eyes, expecting to see the television on, preparing to freak the fuck out. However, I realize the television is not on, but Denise's ipod is. It was in a player which was provided in the room. Now, I'm starting to loose it a bit. I shake Denise awake to tell her the ipod is on, she sleepily asks how, and I say it just turned on. She doesn't seem very shocked by this, and drifts back to sleep. I tell her one of us is going to have to get up to turn it off, cause there is no way I'm sleeping with that thing on. I look at Denise and realize I'm going to have to take care of this mission, because she is almost unconscious again. I run over, yank it out of the player, and turn it off, then I leap across the floor back into bed. I snuggle closer to Denise, cause I'm a tad freaked, and she snores out of nowhere, causing me to jump about a foot and shake the whole bed, which wakes her again.

The rest of the morning, I sleep about an hour, wake up, and try to go back to sleep. I keep imagining some unknown force grabbing my feet, or suddenly hearing voices in my ear. I'm a mess.

When I finally get up, Denise is already awake. She says she had trouble sleeping too because she was scared (could have fooled me;). Anyway, she had the sensibility to look at the ipod player, and saw that there was an alarm function, set to go off at 6:30 AM, exactly when the ipod turned on. Alas, our "supernatural" experience can again be explained away by science... however, we still never figured out how the television came on..hmmmmmmm. :)

Baron

So, this past weekend we got some sad news about Baron. He had been doing this thing for awhile where he seemed to be wheezing and then hacking like he was going to throw up, but nothing would come out. He also had swollen lymph nodes on his body. Denise and I had noticed that it was getting progressively worse, so she finally decided to bring him into the vet. There were some tests the vet needed to perform, but he was fairly positive that Baron has lymphoma. Lymphoma is a common cancer in dogs, and it is aggressive. Often without treatment, a dog will die within 1-2 months of diagnosis.

This was of course quite a shock and painful for Denise to hear. She didn't go into work on Friday (the day she found out), and I left work early in order to be with her. It was a melancholy day to say the least. That night we decided to keep it low key and go to a movie and dinner. We went to see "Into the Wild," which is an inspirational, but also sad, true story about a young boy who leaves everything and everyone in order to travel across the United States to his eventual goal of braving Alaska. I thought the movie was incredibly well cast, acted, and of course stunning. I was glad we chose this movie because Denise had been wanting to see it for awhile, and she needed a bit of an escape from reality.

Anyway, we had a pretty quiet weekend consisting of a dinner on Saturday with friends, a Sunday hike with Baron and a trip to Petco where Baron was surprised with all kinds of disgusting treats (including pig ears, YUCK!). Sunday evening was game night and the final poker show down was again between Phil and I, cause we ROCK! ;) It just felt like a weekend to be with the dog, and make his life from now on as joyous as possible.

Baron went to another vet this week (there was some delays and run around with the other vet, so Denise went elsewhere) and they are starting treatment for the cancer. From what we read, this form of cancers responds well to treatment, and although it won't cure it, he will probably live for about a year. Denise was concerned about his quality of life with the chemo, but she was assured that there is slight discomfort like loose bowels and excess urination, but nothing like what humans go through. The treatment lasts for 2 months, and then we just see what happens.

So, although the news was a blow, we are hopeful that with treatment there are many good times still to be had with Baron, and our biggest concern is that he is happy and does not suffer. I will keep you updated, and here's to BARON! (ps: above is a pic of he and Argo together on the bed, with Argo actually not hissing and slapping Baron. It's a rare occurrence, believe me.:)

Halloween Weekend

So this last weekend was of course full of pre-Halloween fun. Two parties, two nights, twice the craziness.

Friday night Laura had a Halloween party at the fabulous villa. It was all decked out with wispy spiderwebs, ghoulish masks, burning candles, and dead things. PERFECT party spot.

The usual kids were there, along with some new faces, but it was a great night with a dash of randomness thrown in.

Occurrences included one couple claiming that the bottle of wine that Justin was pouring into his 7-11 Big Gulp was $100.00 bottle (which we now suspect was bullshit) even though it was on the communal liquor table, a lesbian with a sneezing fit and beer hidden in a fountain, and a gay man fresh out of the hospital with a tube coming out of his chest (yes, a real tube into chest, not an elaborate costume). Denise and I awoke Saturday morning and probably spent a good hour talking about all the weird shenanigans of the night. I call that a successful soiree.

Saturday night, it was off to a party in North Hollywood put on by gayboymansion productions. I went to a party of theirs 2 years ago when they lived in West Hollywood, and it was great. They had a pirate theme, and spared no expense. This year, the theme was Alice and Wonderland. The guest list had increased tremendously since the party I had attended a few years earlier, and due to the location of the party, the promoters decided to have us shuttled in. Denise, Phil, Justin and I all carpooled to the valley, but before we left Vince took a group shot which I have placed above. Yes, that's Phil, and he is frightening....

Anyway, we got to the valet/shuttle spot to await our chariot. As we sat there, more and more people started to arrive. We were first in line, and the group started to file in behind us. After about a half hour of waiting, the shuttle finally arrived. Much to my shock, the people behind us started to pile in. I was outraged! We had been standing there longer than any of them, and they completely disregarded this fact. I think someone literally said, "Fuck this, let's get a cab." We got the address from the bus driver and off we went. Other people had the same idea, and several of us stood out on Ventura Blvd. yelling at every cabbie that passed our way. Finally a van stopped to pick us up and off we went.

After getting a bit lost in the hills, we found the house! I must say, these boys outdid themselves once again. The decorations were elaborate, animated, and you truly felt like you had been plopped into a wonderland. I even noticed upon leaving the party that they had Alice's face in the window, and blow up hands outside the house to recreate the scene from the movie where she grows gigantic in the rabbits house (it's been awhile, but I think she eats something?)

Yet, despite the decor, after all the drama of getting to the party, my patience was a bit thin. Then, even though the invite said liquor provided but donations accepted, the bartender at the party made us pay for drinks. I had sincerely intended on donating, but I had not brought enough cash to pay for drinks all night. Finally, there was only 1 bathroom in the house for hundreds of people, which equaled Denise and I in line for the bathroom with an annoying straight man for far longer than we would ever choose to be. After that, what little excitement I had left exited my body, and I was just tired and ready to go home. We rounded up the troops (the brits and some other friends met us there) and headed out to wait for the shuttle to get back down to our cars. Oh joy.

After waiting for about a half hour as we had before, the shuttle arrived. Again, the people in the back of the line rushed the van, and we in the front were left with our mouths open steaming inside (well, at least I was). I could not believe the injustice that was happening before my eyes.

After that, I decided I would absolutely not miss another shuttle. I was tired, my feet hurt, I was sober, and I just wanted to go to bed. Time passed, and I waited to see the headlights of the van coming up the hill. I was ready. Suddenly, I saw the lights and focused on the van. It pulled up, the doors opened, and the people in the back started to make their way in. I saw a break in the crowd and I shoved my way ahead. I was an insane woman and no one was going to stop me. This little pushy gay boy was trying to get in front of me, and I would not have it. I think I was yelling, "Get back! We have been waiting for an hour! Get to the back of the line!" He was trying to fight me, but my superhuman strength would not allow it. Also, the guy helping the run the shuttle agreed with me and told the boy to get back. I launched into the bus, and then leaned back out the doors yelling, "Step back! My friends are getting on this bus too!" The look on everyones face was, as they say, priceless! I looked in the direction of my friends and cried, "Get on!" They obeyed, and once the doors were shut, they all cheered and we made it off that damn hill.

Later when I got into bed, and my head hit the pillow, I smiled to myself and did not regret for one moment what I had done. Happy Halloween y'all!

Reality Check

TILA TEQUILA

I was going to write about my drunken exploits from last weekend, but the story sadly seems familiar. Friday night, getting ready to go out dancing, little food, cheap drinks, and a night ending with me being aided to a cab by Denise and 3 body guards sick as can be. Embarrassing, embarrassing, embarrassing....but I'm not going to write about that.




NEW YORK (yes, that's her name)

Instead, I have decided to ponder what seems to be a strange addiction of mine which I can't quite seem to get a handle on.... my addiction to really bad reality TV. I just can't explain it. My scholastic, philosophical side is confused by the ridiculous episodes I subject myself to. My constant awareness that instead of reading Sartre, Dickens, or even David Sedaris to enrich my mind and emotions, I'm sitting in front of a television fixated on the gender stereotypes being perpetuated by Tila Tequila or the latest smack down between two men trying to win New York's heart.



The list of reality television that I watch is too long for anything other than a master thesis, so I'll name one that I have recently become infatuated with, and a few old standards that I just keep going back to.



A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila

When I first saw promos for this show I thought, "Ugh, you have got to be kidding me." I should have known then that I would end up watching the show, because this is generally my initial reaction to things I end up becoming addicted to. This shows basic premise is that Tila Tequila, who is a former Maxim model and most famous Myspace personality (see has like 2 million friends!), is bisexual and has brought on men and women onto the show to compete for her love. The kicker is, none of them knew this going in. In the first episode, Tila meets with the men first, and then with the women, each group thinking they are just competing against their own gender. However at the end, Tila throws a pool party (of course) and invites the men and women. The men arrive first, hooting and hollering at Tila Tequila ready to get this party started. Just as things start to get worked up, the women walk in. Both groups look totally and utterly confused. Tila then announces she "is a bisexual" (which as many bi/lesbian publications have pointed out a bisexual would never say, she would say "I'm bisexual," but I'll just overlook that detail). As you can guess, since then the show has been filled with ridiculous "bonding" activities for Tila and her suitors, PLENTY of drama, fights, gratuitous making out, and "fondling." It is for lack of a better word, insanity.

I Love New York 2

Yes, you read that correctly, this is the second installment of I Love New York. Ms. New York believed she had found love last season, until the man she chose saw a video of her bashing his mother, and "his love for New York" turned into an enraged bitch fest on national television. New York was back to the drawing board and has invited a whole new batch of men on this season to win her heart. Every episode there is a competition for the men to prove themselves to New York, as she sits back with her fake boobs up to her chin sipping a glass of champagne. The men fight each other, degrade each other, and even, as indicated from a preview, spit in each other's faces. Priceless.

Little People, Big World

Little People, Big World is most certainly not some drama filled love fest with little people, but is instead a wholesome show about The Roloffs. The Roloffs are a family who live in Oregon on acres of land covered with ghost towns, tree houses, and a pumpkin patch. The parents, Amy and Matt, are both little people (formerly known as midgets or dwarfs for the uninformed:) who have 4 children. They have twin boys, Zach and Jeremy, but one is little and the other is average height. Their two other children, Molly and Jacob, are average height as well. The show basically just chronicles their everyday life. Family vacations, the kids struggles at school, Amy getting pissed at Matt, Matt's work, life on the farm, and on and on and on. You watch this family have the exact same issues as any other family, the only difference being that some of them are little. Seems exciting?! Not really, but I am glued to that television every Monday (and have been for the last 2 seasons) to watch what the Roloffs with do next. At one point there was a tragedy with a pumpkin throwing apparatus Matt had built, and I felt like members of my own family had been injured (ok, maybe that's a bit extreme, but I was saddened.)

These are just a few of the shows that I consistently watch, and feel the need to tape if I am forced to leave my house on a week night. Why do I care? What possibly drives me to keep watching this idiocy over and over again? Is there ANY value to television shows like this? These are the questions I ask myself over and over again.

Perhaps this is rationalization, with a hint of delusion, but I really think there is something I gain from watching these shows. For one, they are a major stress relief. I do not need to use one ounce of my brain power to watch these shows. I sit back with a glass of wine, and wait for the lunacy I'm about to see with a strange feeling of anticipation. Once it begins, I laugh, shake my head in disbelief, and am constantly shocked at the actions/words coming out of these people's mouths. Which leads to another point, the study of it all. I almost feel like a sociologist watching some elaborate experiment which constantly brings new insight into human interaction. Whether I'm learning what happens when you place a group of people competing to gain the heart of another in one house, or just how families interact on a daily basis, I feel like I'm gaining secret access into people's lives. The reality is I'm sharing this experience with millions of others, but it feels intimate none the less. Finally, these shows really make me realize just how many idiotic people there are out there living in this world, and I appreciate the semi-normalcy I have in my life. It makes any kind of family issues I may have seem like a cake walk, and that is a nice feeling.

All in all, are reality television shows essential to my life? Of course not. Still, I don't think they are going anywhere, and instead seem to be increasing exponentially. I think the reason is simple, people love to watch other people's shit go down on camera. So, enjoy the ride. :)

Feel free to comment with any reality shows you just can't seem to do without.

Hot Springs!

This last weekend Denise and I went to the Deep Creek Hot Springs in Hesperia, CA with our friends Noa, Crystal, and Shannon. Crystal has been there several times, and Denise and I went for the first time last year over labor day weekend, so it has been over a year since we did this trip.

How it works is the actual hot springs are in the middle of the desert after about a 2 mile hike. So, this guy named Mike who owns a ranch there allows people to camp on his land for $10.00 a night. There are camp spots all around his property to choose from.

We left LA at about 9:00 PM Friday evening (we had planned to leave at 7:00 of course, but 2 hours late isn't so bad) and arrived in Apple Valley, which is the last town before you head out into the desert, at around 10:30. We stopped at a grocery store to get some more firewood, liquor, and toilet paper... the essentials. As Shannon, Noa, and myself entered the store we noticed immediately that some of us were not like the others. The stares began immediately, and I started to feel an urgency to get what we needed and get the hell out of there. I'm not sure what exactly set us apart from everyone else, but perhaps it was the fact we had teeth, hair, and were three girls with no babies or men. I can imagine what an unusual sight we must have been. The creepiest family in the store consisted of a very large man in an electronic cart which propelled him around the store. He had a shaved head on top, but left in the back of his head a round circle of long blond curly hair, which went down his back, and was tied with a rubber band. As I said to Denise later, he did not appear to be a monk. He was accompanied by a girl with very badly dyed orange hair, black tight black pants/shirt, several facial piercings, and the most miserable, sad look on her face. She was with what seemed to be her boyfriend, and another kid (her brother?) with a shaved head and an inability to talk. All he did was stare at us continually, and when I mean stare, I mean stare. It was very eerie and I felt at some point our world would suddenly change to black and white with the announcement coming over the store speakers that we had officially entered the twilight zone. I just tried to focus on "Waiting for a Star to Fall" by Boy Meets Girl which was blaring throughout the store as we shopped (Which incidentally was my favorite song in grade school and played another time in my life when I was afraid, the first time I got my ears pierced. Weird huh?).

After making it out of the store unscathed, we hopped in our cars to make our way to the ranch. We noticed at this point it was getting pretty cold out, but we were confident that our fire, tents, and sleeping bags would keep us warm.

We arrived at the ranch at about 11:30, paid our dues, and actually camped in the exact same spot we were at a year ago. Everyone worked on setting up their tents and felt the need to keep layering on more clothes, hats, etc. It just seemed to be getting colder and colder. It became number one priority to get a fire going, and after some gathering of brush, paper and a fire cube provided by Noa, we were successful. As we huddled around the fire, we began to notice that certain items we had brought with us actually had frost on them. Eventually, it was so cold that I couldn't even bring myself to go to the bathroom before getting into our tent for bed. The thought of dropping my pants, and that cold hitting my already freezing ass, was pretty much unbearable at this point, so I decided to just hold it. We got into our tents shaking, shivering, and miserable. Now, Denise and I have sleeping bags that say they are for zero degree weather. I don't know what zero degree weather they are talking about, but I was fucking freezing all night long. My feet would just NOT warm up. I tried rubbing them together, I tried to hold them as close to my body as possible, I took my socks off and and alternated them on top of each other, and I eventually found a hand warmer that I shoved down there to try to make some heat. Nothing worked. At some point during the night I heard Shannons' car turn on. I learned the next day that she had rushed out to sleep in her car and turned it on to try to run the heat. She was soon joined by Noa and they spent the night in the car. In the end, I MAYBE slept 3 hours. I was told that the next morning, Noa and Crystal emerged from their sleeping spots only to stare at each other and hug. It was a, "We survived the night hug," and I'm sure it was a touching moment.

Eventually we got up, and shared our mutual horror of the night. After some breakfast and packing we started the hike down to the hot springs. The hike on the way there is pretty much all down hill (yes, that means the way back is uphill:) so it wasn't bad. When we got there we claimed a spot, ate some food, and Noa, Crystal, and I proceeded to take our tops off (did I mention the hot springs are clothing optional?) and make our way to the pools of heat. To get to the hot springs, you actually have to walk through a small river, so that was pretty cold, but it was worth it once you sat in the wonderful warmth of a spring. Now, in the first pool there were two guys. They were pretty nice, one was a bit of a perv, but there always seems to be a few of those there. Soon, we made our way to the uppermost, and hottest, pool. When we got in it was just us ladies! It was the perfect temperature, and we all just sat there enjoying this beautiful spot. After a few minutes, a beautiful white dog came over to us, and he was accompanied by his owner. The guy seemed creepy almost instantly. He had two fairly large gashes on his face (which looked very recent), a knife was strapped to his left thigh, and an axe. He said to us, "I hope you aren't staying at Bowen Ranch," which we were. When we asked why, he tried to tell us that at least 14 people a year disappear there, and then their abandoned vehicles are impounded making money for the ranch, and the bodies are never found. It was all very strange, and he seemed like the crazy killer, not the ranch owner. After that we left that pool as quick as possible and made our way back to the beach where our stuff was. The rest of the day we relaxed, tried to avoid that man, and watched all the people which made their way to the hot springs. We met another couple that were staying up at the Ranch as well, and they said that the crazy man had told them a similar story, but had thrown in that they have been targeting minorities as well (because these two were African American), nice huh?

At about 5:00 we made our way back up the hill. The hike wasn't too bad, and we all made it back to camp with a killer appetite. Shannon had made chicken, beef, and tofu kabobs for dinner, and she and Denise cooked them while the rest of us got the fire going. At some point we decided that the smartest thing to do was for all of us to pile in one tent so that we would utilize body heat to keep each other warm. Also, Shannon had heard from a friend that when you are sleeping in cold weather, put rocks by the fire to warm them up, and throw them in the bottom of your sleeping bag to keep your feet warm. So we all had our little rocks warming up by the fire. At about 10:00PM bed called us.

We stuffed our air matress, and stacked two others on top of each other, in our tent. Then, we piled up all our sleeping bags, blankets, etc. on top of that. Finally, we each had our warm rocks by our feet. It was hilarious. Here is a picture of us all packed like sardines in the tent. Seriously, Denise could barely zip the tent up because it was stretched to the limit. However, I must say, IT WAS SO WARM IN THERE! All our effort paid off in the heat department, and we all kicked ourselves for not thinking of that Friday night.

So, we all settled in for what we thought was going to be a good nights sleep. I actually did fall asleep pretty quickly because I had my headphones on with the sound of the fan (that Denise recorded for me for when we camp, SO sweet) lulling me into a coma. However, the rest of the ladies were kept awake by what I heard was a roaring wind that would rustle the other tents around us, and it unfortunately sounded like footsteps around our tent. Creepiness! I woke up at about 4:30 AM with an extremely full bladder and a sore back because I was squished all night between Denise and Shannon (did I mention that when we, which was really I, organized the tent for us to fit in, we were heading down hill? Smart, I know). Noa and I ran out into the cold to pee as fast as we could (of course Denise got a pic, but it won't be going up on here;) before freezing to death. Everyone piled back into the tent, and settled in again. I, however, could not fall back to sleep. As happens in the dark of night, my mind started to wander. I kept thinking of that creepy man, how he had a knife and an axe, how he could easily find his way to our camp cause he knew the terrain, and how all that divided us from a crazy man with an axe was a thin piece of nylon/net tent. Suffice it to say, I was fucking freaked out. After about an hour and a half of trying to sleep, I woke Denise up, asked for the keys to her truck and her ipod, and went to lay in the truck. I watched some TV shows on her ipod and waited for the sun to come up. Somehow I managed to fall asleep again for about an hour or so, and was awoken by Denise knocking on the window. She got in with me and began to tell me how she didn't really sleep because she was creeped out by that guy and was hearing things all night. After a few minutes, Noa was knocking on the window, and she got in. Guess what? She really didn't sleep well either. Shannon was next, same story. Finally, Crystal joined us, and we all realized that once again, none of us got a good nights sleep. This time we were all warm, but were so damn scared that despite our exhaustion, we laid awake thinking of killer man. I guess in the end, he won.... bastard.

We packed up camp that morning in record time, and left the Bowen Ranch beaten down but a bit triumphant for making it through the weekend. In town we rushed to "Its a Grind" for coffees and scrambled over each other for a chance to use a real toilet and wash our hands in the sink. The blackness that came off my hands in that bathroom was a site to be seen.

Once Denise and I were home, we immediately showered and got into bed to try to nap. We had plans to meet up with friends (and our camping ladies) at the Abbey around 3:30. Surprisingly enough, every one of us made it to the Abbey looking clean, but a little rough around the edges. ;) At the table we toasted our survival, and discussed our next camping trip. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, but in the end, I will never forget it.

Birthdays and More!

So, when I last wrote, it was a normal Monday in the life of Jen. I went home, watched some television, ate dinner, and was sitting on the couch with Denise when my stomach started to feel unsettled. I decided to go to bed early in the hopes it would settle down. In about an hour I was running to the bathroom... that went on for the rest of the night. I don't think I will eat tofu with broccoli and pine nuts ever again if you know what I mean. ;)

Anyway, I was sure I had food poisoning until the chills/fever/aches set in. I resigned myself to the fact I had the full blown flu. It was awful. I have not felt that horrible in a long time. I couldn't even make it to work Tuesday or Wednesday, and Thursday and Friday I only went in for half days. My body felt so beat down and exhausted. Lucy was SO understanding and even told me to go home when I came into work to rest. She just wanted me to get better. Best. Boss. Ever.

So, on Friday we go up to Sacramento for Denise's Birthday weekend. Great timing for the flu huh? At least by Friday I was eating normal food again and no longer had a fever. We got up there around 9 PM, and some ladies were over at Katy and Becky's house. We just sat around, had some wine, and passed out.

Saturday was the big day. Unbeknownst to Denise, there was a party planned in her honor for that evening, so we had the job of distracting her all day. Becky had come up with the excuse that she had a baby shower to go to at 4 PM. She did a great job, got dressed up and everything. So, after she left, we threw around ideas like going golfing, shopping, etc. Instead, we just ended up going to Costco to get a doggy bed for Baron. Denise kept saying, "Well.... what are we doing tonight?" "Should I call some friends." Everyone kept being very nonchalant and saying that if she wanted to call people that was fine and that we were willing to do whatever she wanted to do. Denise started to get a bit pouty, and while Katy and her friend Sandra decided to go to the grocery store after Costco (of course they were stalling) Denise and I stayed in the car. She was starting to get a bit upset. She didn't really know if she should call people, what was going on, and I think was a bit hurt that it seemed like no one had planned anything. I hated seeing her upset but I knew I had to keep me mouth shut and that in a few minutes, she was going to be a very happy woman. :)

We pulled up to Katy and Becky's house with Denise non the wiser. Everyone had parked down the street, so she didn't see any of their cars. We walked inside and everyone of course yelled, "Surprise!" Denise said she figured it out when she saw the streamers in the house, so really about 2 seconds before everyone yelled. hahaha! It was really fun. Katy grilled steaks, chicken, and a veggie burger for me. :) The food was excellent and everyone sat around talking and catching up. Some of their friends have kids, so they left the party early, while the rest of us set up chairs outside at the table to start a rousing game of poker. The game lasted for hours, Katy was first out as always, and everyone proceeded to get a bit tipsy. In the end, I WON the whole game and walked away with $80.00! It was a good night. After that, due to my drunkeness and still weak body, I stumbled into bed and was out in seconds flat. A bit later I was awakened but two drunks (Denise and Becky) trying to get me to go in the hot tub. I said I only would if Katy did (knowing there was no way) and went back to sleep. I guess they were up for awhile more causing a raucous, but I slept through it all.

On Sunday we slowly wandered around the house and eventually left at around 3:00 in the afternoon to go to Apple Hill. Apple Hill is about a half hour from Sacramento and is known for it's Apple Orchards and the pies that come from them. Did we stop at a little bakery for a bit of pie and coffee? Of course not because there are wineries there too and we needed to get in some tasting before they closed!! LOL We had some excellent wine (a really amazing port that was $30.00 a bottle but totally worth it) and it is quite beautiful in the hills of apples. Afterwards we rushed back to Sac for some sushi because we were all starving. When we got home we were all so wiped out we could barely play a friendly game of poker (Denise is obsessed:) before going to bed at 10 PM!!

Monday was a casual day of lunch and laundry. We left to head back to LA around 4 and arrived at 10. It was another wonderful weekend with those ladies and I think I want to go back for MY Birthday now. Who knows what they will think of for that. :)

Since I was sick last week, and off Monday, this week at work and home has pretty much been a game of catch up. We leave for the Hot Springs tonight (Friday) and come back Sunday morning. Ugh.... I can't wait for next weekend when we do nothing. Will we ever learn....

Stay tuned next week... same bat time, same bat channel. toodles!

Happy Monday

I had to say Happy Monday to everyone because Denise may read this post and I know how much she loves that expression. ;) I laughed so hard when I learned that there are people in her office who actually say "Happy Monday" to their co-workers, and the building where she works posts notices in the elevator that say HAPPY MONDAY! I am reminded of Office Space where that annoying woman says "Looks like someone has the case of the Mondays," and does a sad face. Later, the lead actor asks his neighbor if anyone says that at their construction site where he works, and he responds that no one does and if they did, they would probably get their ass beat. I think that says it all right there.

As I reported last week we went to see Avenue Q at the downtown Ahmanson Theatre on Saturday night. I must say it was extremely entertaining and well acted. The actors had puppets on their hands and many of them played several characters. Even though at first it was a bit distracting to have this person standing there with a puppet on their hand, eventually you stopped really watching the actors and focused on the puppets. They performed such classic tunes as, "It's OK to be gay," "Everyone is a little bit racist," and "The Internet is for Porn." Overall, I really enjoyed myself. There was of course the typical female wanting commitment and the man fearing commitment storyline which I always find a bit nauseating, but I will overlook that because of the overall hilariousness of the show. So, I guess I would say, GO SEE IT if you live in LA or somewhere on it's touring schedule.

Justin's comedy improve gathering on Sunday was a lot of fun. After their performance they had a raffle of random things to raise money for their group. One item was a very large magnetic cheeseburger. Knowing Denise's love of burgers, I knew that I must get her this magnet. However, about halfway through the raffle, a man's name was called who was pressured into taking the burger. Denise was so bummed, but I sat there secretly hoping my name would be called because I knew I could get that burger from him. Finally, close to the end, my name was called. I jumped up and instantly offered the burger man a trade of an item left in the give away box for the burger. He and his girlfriend/wife were so nice and just GAVE me the cheeseburger magnet! Can you believe they would part with such a prize?! I begged them to let me give them something, but they would not have it. In the end, I got my lady her cheeseburger magnet and all was right with the world

We are beginning the 5th season of the Sopranos already! I can't believe we are almost to the last season. I'm getting sad because I know due to watching the Sopranos montage on the Emmys that Adriana is going to be shot because she has been speaking with the Feds. In the episode we watched last night she is beginning to break down because of the pressure...I guess I should know by now that no one is really safe on the show and expect the unexpected.... it is great. :)

The Weekend!

So, this week has FLOWN by as they seem to be doing lately. It has been pretty quiet at work, although Lucy (my boss/other attorney in the office) has forewarned me that it is about to get crazy again for awhile, so I'm gearing up.

I guess the big news for the week is my contract with Verizon was finally up, so I headed on over to AT&T (the rollover minutes and the fact Denise is with them convinced me), and finally got my new phone in the mail! It is the picture to the left, the Blackberry Curve. I was so excited to get a full keyboard on my phone because all the texting I do was so tedious with a standard phone. It is so pretty! The night before I knew it was being delivered to my office I kept dreaming about it! The next day all I could do was watch out the window for the Fedex man, and try to keep the grins on my face to a minimum so my boss would not think I was insane (which I am obviously due to this much excitement over a phone). I spent that night playing with it and I'm still getting used to the features, but so far I love it. I promise after this, I will try not to spend a whole paragraph on my phone, but it's exciting people! :)

As for the weekend plans, Denise is getting in the habit of getting up early on Saturday to go to garage sales. She is a garage sale nut! I really have nothing against garage sales, and I do love to shop for used clothes, furniture, etc., but I just can't bring myself to get excited about getting up on Saturday to go look at people's stuff. Take me to good will, and I'm a happy woman, but garage sales just can't seem to rev me up. I really think it is due to my childhood trauma of having a mother who was an avid garage saler, and dreading every house we pulled up to because there was a chance someone I knew (or worse went to school with) who lived there. I had this horrific vision of showing up to school wearing the used clothes of one of my classmates. See, I went to a school where only clothes from a mall were cool and the word vintage wasn't even in the vocabulary, it was simply just someones used stuff, which meant poor and uncool. Anyway, perhaps I should be telling my therapist all this instead of the whole world, but too late. Then again, maybe I just don't like talking to random people as they stare at me checking out their stuff.... it's a toss up. :) So, I plan on staying in bed.




Saturday night we are going to see Avenue Q! I'm very excited. Basically, I have heard it is like the muppets on crack. They are vulgar, crass, and very unchristian all to a musical soundtrack. Sounds excellent! Here is a link to their website if you are interested: http://www.avenueq.com/

On Sunday we are going to my friend Justin's bar-b-q to hang out with him and his peeps, as well as support their improv comedy team Gas Money. It is rumored we will be honored with a show as well. We have gone to see several of Gas Money's comedy shows, and I must say although I might be bias, they are HILARIOUS!! I am always in awe when I see improv because I am one of those people who will get insulted, and think of the perfect comeback the next day, so I am always impressed that improv people can think of a comeback that is not only perfect but hilarious instantly! If you are interested in Gas Money, here is their Myspace Page http://www.myspace.com/gasmoneyimprov Check it out!!

One final note, Denise started cooking school this past week! She has class Wednesday nights from 6:30-10:30 for 24 weeks I think. She already loves it and informed me that her knife skills have already improved tremendously. I'm not sure if I should be happy or scared from that comment, but all I know is I'm very excited for her and it is great to see her loving something so much. Plus, I get to eat the food she makes (if it contains veggie ingredients) which is a great bonus!

Okay, here's to a fun weekend for all, and hopefully I'll be able to review Avenue Q next week!

Summer's Over?!

Oh my god, where has the time gone?! I cannot believe that summer is over and Holidays such as Halloween, Thanksgiving, and.....ugh, CHRISTMAS are right around the corner. I have not written on here in SO long because work has been a bit nuts, and Denise and I just could not seem to keep our asses in LA this summer.

Some of our highlights included San Francisco Pride, Sacramento, MISSOURI/IOWA (yes, Denise met the family:), Kern River camping, and so much more. Although I probably could go into great detail about all of those trips, I will spare you the blindnees from staring at the computer that long, and instead just place the photo above to show just how beautiful it was in Iowa this summer. I miss green. :(

Anyway, things have finally settled down a bit and we actually had a low key labor day. Saturday night we went to the Hollywood Forever Cemetery to watch the movie "What Ever Happened to Baby Jane." This is a film I had heard so much about and had been wanting to see for awhile. What better way than to watch it in a cemetery under the stars (the few you can see in LA) with good friends, good food (primarily from Trader Joes of course, come on... we're gays), and plenty of wine. It really was a great time, and next weekend we are going to see the Exorcist there!! SO, exciting.

On Sunday Laura, Denise, Shannon, Vince, Justin, and I piled in our cars to make our way to a secret beach Denise knows about in Carpinteria, CA. After 2 hours in the car with traffic not appearing to get any better any time soon, we said fuck it and went to Oxnard. Laura knew of some beaches there. It was a bit crowded, but nothing like the beaches in LA, so it was nice to just chill under an umbrella at the beach and be lazy. The highlight of the day however was in the evening when the waves were breaking on the beach, and right out of the wave jumped 2 dolphins playing. It was AMAZING! They were so close to the shore and it is definitely the best view I have ever had of dolphins in their natural habitat.

On Monday we went over to Vince and Justin's for a bar-b-que, which was nice and low key. Justin and Vince got a new kitten about a month ago, and their dog and the kitty are in love with each other. I put some pictures above of their cuteness.

Denise and I have been watching the Sopranos this summer. I didn't have HBO when it was on, but I heard such great things about it, I decided to add it to my Netflix. We are a bit obsessed. When Denise watches it her Long Island accent comes out (she has repressed it since they moved from there when she was 10;), and she says stuff such as "git atta here," and "hay, hay, hay." Of course she must lift her hands to about waist level, put her palms up, connect her thumb and index finger, and move them up and down when she says this stuff. It is awesome.

So, that is the snapshot of my summer and past weekend. Hopefully I can get back into the habit of writing here more often. Hope all is well!!

Stuff

So, this last weekend was pretty low key, and that was TOTALLY fine with me. Denise and I have been so busy lately it was really nice to have some time where there really weren't a lot of specific plans.

On Friday night we met our friend Noa and her girlfriend Caity out for Sushi. We had been hearing about Caity for some time, but were beginning to doubt her existence because she was always MIA when we saw Noa. I'm happy to report she is a real person, is really nice and great to talk to. We took them to Denise's sushi place in the valley called Chiba, which is in a pretty rough looking area of town and is in a mini mall. hahaha! However, it is a family owned place and people LOVE it there, and according to everyone at the table, the sushi is amazing. Denise is kind of a sushi snob, so she is very particular about where we go. As for me, since I only eat vegetable rolls with soy paper, I really don't care where we eat because it is pretty hard to mess that up. Anyway, it was great and we all left there feeling like we would explode.

We headed off to Truckstop in West Hollywood. Truckstop is a lesbian night at HERE lounge on Fridays. There is a DJ, two bars, and every so often the bartenders (the girl ones) get up on the bar and dance to music. It is a tad cheesy and Coyote Uglyish, but it is still fun. Unbeknowst to us, it was their 1 year anniversary, so it was packed! We saw several of our friends there, and had a really great time. Eventually, Noa and her girlfriend went to get some chocolate, and Denise and I left soon after. At the door we were stopped by our friend AJ who told us that if we waited like 5 minutes, we would see Michelle (one of the promoters) get pulled up on the bar to dance because it was her Birthday. AJ was distracted for a minute, and Denise said, "Do you care?" and I said, "Not really." So we used our stealth moves to escape.:)

On Saturday we met up with our friend Laura after to lunch to go shopping. We first had to stop by William Sonoma in Beverly Hills to sit on a couch for Denise's mom back in New Orleans, to report the softness and deepness of the couch. hahaha! We walked in there with our cut off jeans, t-shirts, and greasy hair and commenced sitting. The couch we were there to look at was not what her mom wanted, but the sales people were nice and tried to give us alternatives to tell her about. Who knows what will happen, but it was quite funny being in there because everyone was so professional and we just looked like bums. :)

After that, we went to Loehmanns where no one would give two shits about what we were wearing. We browsed and tried on several things, but Laura was most definitely the winner of the day. However, I did become a Loehmanns member, so I got 10% off, woo hoo!

That night, it was off to the Normandie room to say good-bye to someone who is leaving for the UK, and then the Abbey. I really wasn't drinking too much because I have really tried to slow down after Cinco De Mayo. However, Denise was wasted. ahahah! It actually rarely happens that Denise gets this drunk, so it was pretty funny. She kept insisting that she wasn't drunk as she stared at me with her squinty eyes and swerved down the sidewalk. I got her home, put her to bed, and placed a very large bottle of water next to her which I knew she would appreciate in the morning.

On Sunday we went to Frys electronics to help our friend Jess get some things for her new apartment. Frys is one of Denise's most favorite places to go, so she was thrilled to help. After a quick stop at Target, they took me home cause I was starting to feel a bit of a cold coming on. I napped a bit while Denise went to Trader Joes, and then Corey, Phil, and Mark came over for game night, which turned into Denise teaching them to play poker. It was so fun and interesting playing with gay boys. Since we weren't playing for money and didn't designate chips as certain monetary amounts, they would coordinate chip colors and save the "pretty chips" for last. At one point, Corey bet several chips and said, "Lets make this spicy." ahaha! I bet you don't hear that too much in Vegas.

Anyway, it was a nice weekend to help me prep for our 2 marathon camping weekends coming up. This weekend we are camping in Malibu with like 40 lesbians (I'll report back how many guitars and knives there were), and next weekend we are camping in Baja with about 450 burning man people. Should be a WHOLE other experience.

Tomorrow is the 2 hour season finale of LOST and I can barely contain myself. I found a spoiler site that I sent to Denise that said they knew who was going to die, etc. I could not bring myself to look, but Denise did. She says she is not sure how she feels about the person dying. Hmm... Guess I'll know soon! Alright, back to work!

Cinco De Mayo and Stuff

As most of you probably know, last weekend was cinco de mayo, which means copious amounts of alcohol must be consumed. I must say, Denise and I fully obliged.

Starting at around 2 PM we headed out to a fundraiser held every year by a group of lesbians called, Single De Mayo (I will give a moment for the groans). haha! Actually though, it is a great event where they raise money for Teen Line, a teen suicide hot line which helps gay youth. Although it is called "Single" De Mayo, everyone can go of course.

We got to the party around 2:30 and after some confusion about the entrance fee and paying for drinks, we got in. If you are single they will take a Polaroid picture of you to place on the wall, and if someone thinks you are cute, they can leave a note for you. Denise finds it amusing every year to put a note on a friends pic just to make them think someone wrote them. I know, she's cruel. ;)

On the wall they had stickers with various sayings on them color coded. Green = single, and Red (really orange) = Not single. I chose the red sticker which said 'hung like a horse," where Denise chose "Token Straight Girl," and "Couldn't be gayer," because she loves to flip flop (not really, but I've always wanted to use that.) My friend Phil came as well, which I thought was awesome. I love Phil for that reason, he will totally come to lesbian events and not care that he is one of the few gay men there.

After that, we commenced drinking. Through the day we had vodka, took pictures in the photo studio (the party is at a photo studio and it's backlot), snacked on some chips, waited in line to pee, and caught up with some friends I hadn't seen in awhile. It was a great day.

Around 8:30 or so (yes, we were there 6 hours) we left to make a stop at the apartment to pick up our friend Corey and went off to my friend Maliha's Birthday party to yes, drink more. I really don't know how many drinks I had at her party, my memory is a bit blurry as to the remainder of the evening. What I do know though, is that I at some point completely forgot to eat anything. So, my main meal of the day had been a veggie burger (no bread mind you) at around noon that day. Yes, it was about to get bad. I passed out in our apartment hall later, and Denise had to literally drag me into the apartment while she struggled to stand up in her own drunkeness. She left me in the floor as she did got the animals and bed ready, then hoisted me in as I was passed out. She is wonderful....

The next morning, the pain I felt in my head and the gurgling in my stomach was pretty much making me wish I was dead. I laid on the couch, puked, ate a bit, still had a headache, felt sick again, stayed on the couch, ate a bit, took a nap, woke up, still had a headache, ate, felt like shit, and on and on and on for the whole day into the night. I can say I really did cinco de mayo justice. I swear, last night is the first time I have had a drop of alcohol since last weekend. Ugh

Anyway, in other news...work is busy, Immigration is still frustrating to deal with, my boss is great, and Denise and I are going to IOWA in July to visit my family. I'm very excited because I have not been home in about a year and half, which is the longest I have gone without going back. Denise has never been to the mid-west, so I look forward to introducing her to loose-meat sandwiches, pork tenderloins, Sterzing potato chips, and corning. hahaha...any more questions as to why I'm a vegan now? ;)

Finally, LOST Wednesday was really awesome but left me with SO many questions, again... So much happened that I really can't recap it all, but if you are interested here is a site I like with screen captures and forums www.humpys.net The episodes just keep getting more and more exciting, but of course, the never ending question of where this is leading is looming in the back ground. I just read that the writers have officially announced that LOST will go on for 3 more seasons, and that's it. I find that both comforting and daunting. One the one hand, it is nice to know that this show will have an end and the writers know where it is going. On the other hand, that means we are only halfway through the story! So, how are they going to keep the show interesting for that long, without revealing too much? I guess we will just have to wait and see...

Alright, it's Friday and I get to go home early! Yea! Have a great weekend!